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Rekindle the Relationship in an Underwater Waking Dream: A Couple's Guided Dreaming Experience

Writer's picture: Bei Linda TangBei Linda Tang

Updated: 2 days ago

In our fast-paced, technology-driven world, many couples unintentionally drift apart due to the myriad responsibilities of work, family life, and personal commitments. These disconnections, whether subtle or overt, can impede intimacy and affection. This was true for a married Muslim couple originally from Sudan who are currently living and working in Canada while raising their six children.


A couple dreaming together in a serene underwater environment

With a growing emotional divide, they turned to Guided Dreaming to rekindle their relationship and enhance their communication. In their underwater dreaming journeys, which I had the privilege of facilitating, they experienced a treasure trove of shared memories, emotions, and a renewed sense of harmony that offered profound insights into their unity and love.


Dreams reflect subconscious memories and emotions and resolve waking life challenges through symbols and metaphors. Throughout history, various cultures, both ancient and modern, have engaged in the practice of wake dreams to foster individual and collective well-being, underscoring their significance in promoting overall wellness within communities.


What is Guided Dreaming?


Guided Dreaming is an evidence-based mental wellness practice that utilizes an underwater waking dream experience featuring a friendly octopus to facilitate stress reduction and problem-solving. I recently developed this unique approach based on personal waking dreams during the Pandemic, combined with neuroscience, psychology, and ethical dreamwork by the International Association for the Study of Dreams. Participants can bring a problem and a helper into the process and are supported in interpreting their dream experiences to derive personal transformative insights.


The Husband's Dream


At the beginning of their session, the husband, when prompted to visualize a healing place by the water, chose to visit Dafi Beach, located on the Arabian Gulf in Abu Dhabi, a site that held personal significance during his time in the United Arab Emirates. This was not merely a physical location but a place of longing—an embodiment of tranquillity where he often sought solace. He described himself as sitting high above the sea. The rhythmic lapping of waves had provided him with an intrinsic harmony, a metaphor for the synchronization he desired with his life. The beautiful blue sea became not just a backdrop but a reflection of their emotional currents, mimicking the ebbs and flows of their interactions.


When I suggested that the husband bring a helper to accompany him underwater, an intriguing internal dilemma arose. Initially, he felt an urge to explore beyond his wife, fearing that her presence might hinder his discovery of new experiences. However, he soon came to an important realization: his wife was not just a companion but an essential part of this journey. This understanding marked the beginning of their shared adventure into the depths of the ocean, revealing their deep-seated emotions and commitments.


The husband's experience during the waking dream conveyed a vivid sense of harmony with the serene waves, suggesting a deep connection to both the sea and his beloved wife. This symbolic link emphasized that even when driven by a desire for individual exploration, their love and connection formed the essence of that journey. He recognized his wife's vital presence, viewing her as a part of himself, which underscored the strength of their intimate bond. This profound realization redirected his focus inward, allowing them to merge their identities within the ocean's depths.


The imagery of him and his wife swimming joyfully alongside vibrant fish and an enchanting octopus resonated with the ideals of harmony and unity. Their merging with the Octopus, described as a mystical experience—"an octopus with three heads"—symbolized a shared consciousness that connected them. This imagery is rich with meaning, encapsulating how their identities intertwine, each supporting the other's emotional landscape.


The Wife's Dream


On the other hand, the wife's waking dream unfurled with a gentle simplicity, illustrating a solitary place near the sea where the couple could be themselves. Barefoot on the cool sand, she recalled feelings of pure joy and presence as they strolled hand in hand. Through her lens, the dream shifted seamlessly between calm reflection and playful exploration, echoing the dual realities of life as partners and as individuals. Her immediate choice to bring her husband into this dream world reflects their bond—one that is infused with affection and trust.


The couple's simultaneous descent into the sea encapsulated a metaphorical dive into their relationship—an exploration of shared depths and hidden treasures. The appearance of the Octopus, each perceiving it in different colours but sharing the same intimate experience, assisted in solidifying this symbolic connection. The wife described the Octopus as reaching out and welcoming them as long-lost friends, illustrating their deep yearning for connection—not only with each other but also with life's wonders. The experience transformed a simple act of swimming into a profoundly spiritual journey, where joy permeated every moment they spent together.


Moreover, the wife initially struggled with knee pain, which brought to the surface an arthritic reminder of life's challenges, emphasizing how pain can be a barrier but also a catalyst for deeper emotional healing. Choosing to set aside this discomfort to immerse herself in the moment illustrates a strong desire for unity with her husband—a desire that enhances their bond. Their journey into brighter waters signified support, understanding, and the beauty of navigating challenges together.


This Guided Dreaming experience serves as a deeply evocative reminder of the profound healing that can emerge from shared memories and emotions within a relationship. The vast, mysterious depths of the sea beautifully parallel the intricate layers of connection that dwell within couples, suggesting that, like the ocean, their bond is both complex and enchanting. Meanwhile, the vibrant marine life that darts through the water embodies the myriad joys and challenges that life presents, each one adding to the colourful tapestry of their shared existence. As the couple embarked on this journey, they not only rekindled the passionate spark that once ignited their love but also ventured into the rich, uncharted territories of both their unity and individuality. In a world often dominated by the relentless pressures of daily routines, such nourishing waking dream experiences emerge as invaluable opportunities—a gentle nudge not merely to dream but to rediscover the essence of who they are together. They reflect the profound depths of love that lie just beneath the surface, waiting to be reawakened and cherished.


How to book Guided Dreaming for Couples


Couples interested in participating in Guided Dreaming together are welcome to do so in group or private sessions. Please visit our Services Page to book.



About Bei Linda Tang


Bei Linda Tang is the founder of Dream Heals and the author of "Navigate Life with Dreams." She is the Western Canadian representative for the International Association for the Study of Dreams and developed Guided Dreaming, a mental wellness practice for stress reduction and problem-solving that combines personal waking dreams with neuroscience and psychology. Bei Linda holds a Master's in Health Psychology and an MBA, and lives in Vancouver, Canada, with her husband, two children, and parents.

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Dream Heals is situated on the unceded traditional territories of the xÊ·mÉ™θkÊ·É™yÌ“É™m (Musqueam), Sḵwx̱wú7mesh (Squamish), and sÉ™lilwÉ™taɬ (Tsleil-Waututh) Nations and is committed to healing intergenerational traumas caused by colonization, cultural genocide, racism, and other social injustices through Guided Dreaming and dreamwork.

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